In a new interview, Bibi Darshan Kaur joins by telephone. Her husband and other family members were killed in Delhi in 1984. She speaks about losing them, then facing threats and pressure as she tried to get justice. Forty-two years later, she is still telling people what happened. [1]
The interview was published by Punjab First Voice on 30 October 2026. Journalist Pankaj Kapahi speaks with Harvinder Singh Phoolka, a senior lawyer who has helped families take their cases to court. Readers can hear Bibi Darshan Kaur from about 41 minutes 50 seconds. This summary follows the Panjabi captions, the written words shown with the video. It has not been checked word for word against the speech. [1]
India’s Prime Minister, Indira Gandhi, was killed on 31 October 1984. In the days that followed, crowds of attackers targeted Sikh families in Delhi and other parts of India. People were killed, homes were burned and families had to flee. Government records list 3,325 people killed, including 2,733 in Delhi. [2] The loss continued in the years afterwards, as families tried to rebuild their lives and bring the killers to court.
Phoolka also recalls how Hindu neighbours and friends helped him and his pregnant wife escape. [1] Their help belongs in this history too. A person’s religion does not tell us whether that person helped, harmed people or turned away. We have to find out what each person did.
Here in Britain, poppies are worn in November to remember those who died in war. The Royal British Legion links that remembrance with care for people still living. [3] That makes me think about what we do after our own remembrance gatherings. Who keeps in touch with a family once the speeches are over? Who helps when a court case becomes difficult or a child needs support?
Listening to the Guru
These accounts bring me to Guru Sahib’s teaching about fear and the way we treat other people.
The Roman line is only a reading aid, not the translation. The English sentence gives the plain meaning.
Guru Tegh Bahadur Sahib says:
ਭੈ ਕਾਹੂ ਕਉ ਦੇਤ ਨਹਿ ਨਹਿ ਭੈ ਮਾਨਤ ਆਨ ॥
ਕਹੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਸੁਨਿ ਰੇ ਮਨਾ ਗਿਆਨੀ ਤਾਹਿ ਬਖਾਨਿ ॥੧੬॥
Simple reading: Bhai kaahoo kau det nahi, nahi bhai maanat aan.
Kahu Nanak sun re manaa, giaanee taahi bakhaan.
Plain meaning: One who frightens no one and fears no one else: Nanak says, listen, O mind, call that person spiritually wise.
Reference: Shabad Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Salok Mahalla 9, Guru Tegh Bahadur Sahib, Panna 1427. Complete Salok 16, read with the nearby Saloks. Mahalla 9 means the Ninth Guru. Panna means page; a Salok is a verse. [4]
Guru Sahib speaks of wisdom in our life with the Creator. The nearby Saloks describe a person who remembers the Creator, is free from greed and pride, and is not led by praise or blame. These words ask me to look at my own choices. Fear of losing someone’s friendship or praise must not stop me asking what happened to a family who needed help.
I apply that teaching to people with power too. It asks something of the person able to help. A family under attack needs protection; it does not need us to judge its fear. The person in office should keep trying to get help, even when speaking up may cost a job or the approval of powerful friends.
Who we remember in Ardas
Ardas is our prayer. Its closing words ask for sarbat da bhala, the good of everyone, as the Creator wills. We can bring the needs of the day into Ardas while keeping its fixed opening and closing words the same. [5]
When we bring those needs into Ardas, I want us to remember the innocent people killed in 1984 and in Panjab during the 1990s. We should remember those who were hurt, whose homes were destroyed, who had to flee and who never found out what happened to someone they loved. Their lives matter even when their names are missing from a book or a list.
The good of all reaches beyond Sikhs. It includes the Muslim families attacked in Gujarat in 2002. [6] It includes innocent people killed, hurt or driven from their homes in Israel and Gaza, in Sudan and other parts of Africa, and anywhere else in the world. We can ask for care for those who are hurt and for strength to help them, whatever their faith or country.
Remembering our own losses should help us hear other people’s pain. We must still find out who did each wrong and who failed to protect people. To care for people, we must be willing to tell the truth about what happened to them.
The questions that remain
We must also ask what people with power did to help. In 1984, Giani Zail Singh was President of India and Tarlochan Singh was his press secretary, who dealt with the news media. Families’ calls for help reached their office. Tarlochan Singh’s statement to the Nanavati Commission, which looked into the killings, describes those calls and the President’s efforts to get help. [7] The families have the right to ask what help reached them and what was tried next when those efforts failed.
I examine what both men did in a separate essay, When a Sikh Home Becomes a Target, to be published on Monday, 2 November. I sent Tarlochan Singh written questions on 21 October, asking for a reply by 27 October. As of 31 October, I have received no reply. Any reply will be published in full with that essay.
The people who planned and carried out the killings must answer for their crimes. Anyone who hid crimes or blocked justice must answer for what they did too. Those who failed to use their position to help must explain their choices. We should be clear about what each person did, and correct what we have written if new evidence shows it is wrong.
Help that lasts
Sikhs already remember through Ardas, gatherings and the work of families and others who seek justice. We can build on that work. A Gurdwara or another Sikh group can agree, with a family, to keep helping after the yearly gathering. That may mean paying for a lawyer, helping a witness get to court or supporting a child’s education. The family should choose its lawyer and decide what personal details may be shared.
A person should not have to speak on a stage or agree with a group’s leaders to receive help. Nor should help stop when a complaint is about someone with powerful friends. Every government has the duty to keep people safe and find out who committed crimes. Our help should make it easier for families to demand that their government does this work.
We can also keep records safe for the future. A person who lived through an attack should decide whether to tell a story and how it may be used. We should listen with care and avoid making someone repeat painful details just to hold an audience’s attention.
Guru Sahib’s words return me to the fear that can keep us quiet and the harm we can do to others. I cannot care more about someone’s good name than about a family asking what happened to a person they loved. When we remember this November, I hope our Ardas will help us carry that care into our lives. Bibi Darshan Kaur and other families should not have to carry the search for truth alone.
Related work
Who Holds the Chain?
No One Heeded the Dead
When a Sikh Home Becomes a Target. To follow, Monday, 2 November 2026.
The Duty to Find Out. To follow.
Sources
Checked to 31 October 2026. The interview captions, Gurbani at SriGranth and in Darpan, and the British remembrance page were checked on 31 October. New checks that day covered Ardas and the Gujarat report. The earlier 26 October check of Tarlochan Singh’s statement for the forthcoming essay is retained; the statement was also read again on 31 October. The English meaning is a learning aid informed by Darpan. The application is the writer’s.
[1] Punjab First Voice, Pankaj Kapahi’s interview with Harvinder Singh Phoolka, 30 October 2026. Darshan Kaur: approximately 41:50–49:21; her husband is mentioned at 46:16. Phoolka’s escape: 26:25–36:36. These summaries follow the displayed Panjabi captions, not a full translation checked against the audio.
[2] Government of India, Ministry of Home Affairs, Financial assistance to anti-Sikh riot victims, Press Information Bureau, 1 March 2016. Official recorded death figures. Checked 31 October 2026.
Government recorded death figures
[3] Royal British Legion, About Remembrance, on remembering those who died and caring for the living. Its work centres on the Armed Forces community.
Royal British Legion on remembrance
[4] Shabad Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Salok Mahalla 9, Guru Tegh Bahadur Sahib, Panna 1427, complete Salok 16, with the surrounding Saloks and Professor Sahib Singh Ji’s Darpan. Darpan explains the line as neither frightening others nor being frightened by them.
[5] SGPC, Sikh Rehat Maryada, Panjabi edition, printed pages 10 and 12; English edition, Article IV(3)(a), printed page 21, note 3, and page 23, note 1. These identify the protected opening and closing words and the place for the purpose of a gathering. The proposed remembrance here is the writer’s application of that provision.
Sikh Rehat Maryada, pages 10 and 12
English Sikh Rehat Maryada, Article IV(3)(a)
[6] Human Rights Watch, We Have No Orders To Save You, April 2002, on attacks against Muslims in Gujarat and the destruction of homes and livelihoods. No casualty estimate is used here.
Human Rights Watch report on Gujarat
[7] Tarlochan Singh, statement before the Nanavati Commission, witness 134, 12 December 2001, reproduced by Discover Sikhism. It records two telephone calls from the President to Delhi’s Lieutenant Governor, on the night of 31 October and the morning of 1 November. The signed original was not inspected.
Anyone named here may reply, and a substantive reply will be published with the article.
Errors will be corrected publicly with a dated note.
Strong disagreement is welcome. Contempt is not.
Bhul chuk maaf karni Ji.
Gurjit Singh Sandhu
PanthSeva
London